Monday, 4 February 2013

A Healthy Sense of Fear

I learned at a very young age to fear the dentist. He was always the one who put sharp objects in my mouth and made me cry from the giant ass freaking needles. I've had a lot of needles in my 27 years, and the ones at the dentist are by far the largest. Because of this, I came to see my poor, sweet, patient and kind dentist as a serial tooth kidnapper, something akin to that guy who offered Anne Hathaway money for her teeth in Les Mis. This healthy fear has lead me to have a very, well, let's just say, special relationship with my dentist. He's the only dentist I have ever known. I've been seeing him basically since I grew teeth. I guess you could say he's also the longest relationship I've ever had. I always joke that my dentist has to prepare for a week before I come and visit him, but it's not really a joke. Just like every other health care professional in my life, he knows that I am not an easy patient to have. There are almost always tears, and yelling, and petulance, and a little bit of bargaining. At the end of the day, he is the only one who has never given into my demands, which is actually quite surprising. He's also the only who looks genuinely terrified when he sees me, but that's usually because I am yelling about the fact that I have a cavity or some other dental malady.

Today I saw my dentist. And he came in with that same deer in the headlight fear in his eyes as he does every single time I go to see him. But this time, there were no tears, only light banter that I thought made him really uncomfortable. He looked like a poor cornered animal, or someone who knew that they were dealing with a potentially volatile situation and all he wanted to do was back away slowly. Which is exactly what he did after he told me that I have no cavities. That's a freaking miracle considering all the things I consume on a similar basis.

How am I celebrating you ask? By consuming as much sugary crap as I possibly can. And trying to plan a trip for my gentleman and I. Except that's hard and I just want to go, not have to plan it. I'm failing at adulthood right now. Here's this instead.

Hugs and rainbows!


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